Should I Stay or Should I Go Now?

My love/ hate relationship with Facebook Groups.

We all know that participating in Facebook groups can be great for business. Showing up and adding value, demonstrating your knowledge, supporting and encouraging fellow entrepreneurs, soaking up the wisdom from people in different fields.

When it all goes well. . .it’s a powerful resource, a way to stay connected, discover people doing seriously cool shit, get fresh perspectives and serve without an agenda.

At one point I belonged to 100+ Facebook groups and I’ve run a couple as well (admittedly they were very small and for a very specific purpose).

Here’s what I’ve learned about myself navigating the ever-changing landscape of Facebook groups as an entrepreneur.

  1. I hate being an admin.


I don’t enjoy running a Facebook group. I love being part of a community, I even love taking a “leadership” role but planning content, worrying about engagement and making sure you stay on top of threads? Hell no. I want to show up, support, encourage and engage when I feel inspired. Somedays I don’t have the words or emotional bandwidth for anything more than a heart or a thumbs up. And schedules are. . .constricting.

2. There can be too much of a good thing.


Spreading my energy across 100+ Facebook groups because I thought they were a good strategy for business and visibility, and engaging with potential clients? Nope. Maybe a good idea for conducting research but otherwise. . .dumb idea. I ended up feeling drained. Not really being seen, effective or consistent anywhere. And no real connections were made. Now, I have a handful of spaces I love and shop up in on the regular.


3. Be clear about why you’re there and what you’re getting out of it.

When I was promoting the book I self-published on Amazon I belonged to over 50 groups where I would show up just to promote my book. Even though I always followed the rules it never felt good. It was a chore to cross off my to-do list.

When I was conducting research for my business and also belonged to over 50 business groups I’d pop in a poll. Ask for opinions. Throw up a question and mine the answers for gold. That was useful. . .sort of but it was also draining.

I’m a big believer in an equal exchange of energy. Give and take. When I showed up like this. . .it wasn’t an equal exchange of energy. And even when I made an effort to go in and participate, offer value, comment and encourage. . .my heart wasn’t in most of those spaces.

Be clear about WHY you’re in a particular Facebook group. How do you plan to show up? What are your intentions? And what are you getting out of it? Research? Clients? Wisdom/info/knowledge? Friendship? Collaboration? For me, I know it only feels good when it’s an equal exchange of giving and taking.



I LOVE going through Facebook groups (and emails I subscribe to) and leaving them in droves. It makes everything feel more spacious. . .lighter. And it leaves room for something more amazing to come into your life.

Most of the time I can just look at a Facebook group and say. . .

But if I’m hesitating and not sure if I’m really feelin’ it these are the questions I ask myself to gain clarity.

  1. How does this group benefit me as a person or my business?

  2. Does it feel good to be here and scroll through the feed? Do I feel uplifted and energized?

  3. Does it feel safe to show up as myself and offer my wisdom/truth/insight/opinion without judgement, criticism or trolling?

  4. Do I feel supported in living my best life/building my best business and do I feel able to do that for others?

  5. Do I feel drained, confused or negative when I engage with this group?

  6. Does being here feel like just one more thing to do?

  7. Is there too much negativity (competition, judgement, criticism, anger, bitching) that infect my optimism when I read through posts? (I once had an IRL workspace where people bonded over complaining and generally commenting on how horrible life/work was. I had no idea how much it affected my outlook until I left).

Then you just sit and listen for the answers. You already know what you need to know. It’s amazing how Facebook groups have the capacity to foster a sense of belonging and leaving them can sometimes feel challenging. but it’s worth looking for the spaces (both online and in real life where you feel truly supported and able to show up as yourself).

Need a little Clash in your life? Watch “Should I Stay or Should I Go”

xoxo
Jess